Funny Quotes

Giving up smoking is easy...I've done it thousands of times.
(Mark Twain)
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When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep, not screaming, like the passengers in his car.
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Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers.
(Homer Simpson)
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I remember the time I was kidnapped and they sent a piece of my finger to my father. He said he wanted more proof.
(Rodney Dangerfield)
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Never stand between a dog and the hydrant.
(John Peers)
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You have a cough? Go home tonight, eat a whole box of Ex-Lax, tomorrow you'll be afraid to cough.
(Pearl Williams)
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I'm always amazed to hear of air crash victims so badly mutilated that they have to be identified by their dental records. What I can't understand is, if they don't know who you are, how do they know who your dentist is?
(Paul Merton)
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You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'.
(Homer Simpson)
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If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?
(Steven Wright)
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You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where the hell she is.
(Ellen DeGeners)
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Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.
(Mark Twain)
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A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff
(George Carlin)
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Folks, the President needs a break. He’s like a Black and Decker cordless Dirt Devil vacuum. If you don’t recharge his batteries, he can’t suck
(Steven Colbert)
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Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
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Vegetarian are those people that hate plants.
(A. Whitney Brown)
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If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button.
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What year did Jesus think it was?
(George Carlin)
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Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children.
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Zero-zero is a big score.
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I can resist everything except temptation.
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How to make a million dollars: first, get a million dollars.
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When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.
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Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they've got nothing to lose.
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Is it good if a vacuum cleaner really sucks ?
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The Bender

This is my cat.
The name is "Bender", like the robot in the Futurama cartoons.
I think they both have the same color.


Sometimes he may stay on his legs, too, but I have to admit that this is hard'on him and he can't do it all the times.


The original Bender is lazy, too.





Anyhow, this was not one of the days for him to bother to get up and fight the world :P










After a while, he decided to turn on the other side...









... hard decision to take, loool :D


Will come back with other images, as soon as he'll get on his feet.
...